Minor venting

[Background: I have a number of collecting-based hobbies. I currenty have an item from Collectible Hobby A listed for sale, and an item from Collectible Hobby B listed for trade.]

Did I accidentally walk under a cursed collectible ladder or something? Apparently this week was declared Send Krait Dubious Offers Weeks and I missed the warning memo.

I've got one potential buyer who started off begging for time payments, changed her mind when I said I'd like a week to see if anyone could pay in full, and now wants to dicker about Paypal fees (with the classic "but other sellers pay them themselves" guilt-trip approach; yes, because they include it in the item price! I offer multiple payment options, so I only include it if you're paying via Paypal) while begging me to mail the item Monday - even though my ad states that I can only mail on Saturdays, and she hasn't even given me her address yet. All in the most cutesy, exclamation-riddled choppy sentences possible. D:<

And now I check my email to find a potential trader has contacted me, except it's her "friend without a computer" who wants to trade and I should pass all the information through her - notably, without any mention of details such as whether her friend is even in the same state where she is, or how well she knows this person, or any mention of making arrangements to send me a photo to prove her "friend" has this item at all!

< insert grumpyface here >

I've sent both of them what are (hopefully) very polite responses, explaining to the one that the fees are added because I have multiple payment options and that my work schedule is the reason I can only ship Saturdays, and to the other that I'm not comfortable trading sight-unseen through a third party but perhaps she could help her friend set up an email account for photos and we could use the double-Paypal-payment method.

Let's see if I get more whining or weirdness, or radio silence, or actual cooperation.

Wanna place bets, anybody? :/